Becoming A Big Sister

The Application Process

As an organization that works with children, we are required to screen all of our potential Big Sisters. The application process is designed to prepare our Big Sisters for their new role as a mentor and to ensure the safety of our Little Sisters. Mentoring is not for everyone, and this process will help you decide if mentoring is right for you.

Requirements of Potential Big Sisters

  • Must be 18 years of age or older
  • Must be a positive role model taking into account occupation and life experience
  • Must have an automobile, insurance, and a good driving record
  • Must be willing to undergo extensive screening and participate in training before being matched with a Little Sister
  • Must be reliable and able to keep regular meetings with her Little Sister
  • Must be able to maintain a relationship with her Little Sister for a minimum of one year.

Steps to Becoming a Big Sister
(Click here for a PDF version of this checklist)

  1. STEP ONE
    checkbox You have contacted the Big Sister League of San Diego, Inc. (either through our Contact page, or a phone call), and you have completed an application and submitted a photo.  This may take a bit of time to gather all of the information required.  It gives us a real "snapshot" of the caring and sensitive person that you are.  If at all possible, please include an actual snapshot of yourself so that I may share the photo when I talk with your potential Little Sister and her family.  The Orientation meeting will introduce you to the basic Big Sister/Little Sister Program and we will let you know via e-mail the date of the next monthly orientation meeting and time.  The training session includes the various steps listed below and more details about accomplishing these steps.  The orientation also covers a variety of subjects like becoming familiar with questions that may be asked by the Little Sister and how to answer them, awareness of situations that may arise and how to handle them, and understanding how to interact with the Little Sister’s family.  If you cannot simply get away for an orientation session, don’t worry, we are trying some alternatives like having an evening orientation meeting once in a while.  Also, call me and we can arrange a private orientation session for you; I will meet with you here or at your home on an extended lunch break at work to get a child a special mentor like you!

  2. STEP TWO
    checkbox There is a California Law-Megan's Law, which requires anyone that works with children have their fingerprints screened through the Department of Justice.  Fill out the "Request for Live Scan Service" according to instructions provided at your orientation session.  Refer to the list of locations to have your scan done. Go there during the hours listed, prepared to pay the amount indicated by whatever means they accept.  Your fingerprints will be forwarded to Sacramento electronically and the clearance will be forwarded to our office by e-mail. Remember not to use hand cream that day as this sometimes blurs results and then the process has to be done again.

  3. STEP THREE
     checkbox Go to the Department of Motor Vehicles and get a print-out of your driving record- it will cost $5.00.  making an appointment (either online or by phone, 1-800-777-0133) to save time..  You can also request the driving record online at Department of Motor Vehicles.  Then the driving record will be mailed to you and you can forward it along to our office by mail when you receive it.

  4. STEP FOUR
    checkbox Copy your proof of insurance card for car insurance and include that with your application. If you don’t have access to a photocopy machine, bring it to the Big Sister League house and I can copy it for you.

  5. STEP FIVE
    checkbox Please include two personal references on your application.  We may check these references on a random basis.  (Limit to one family member please.)

  6. STEP SIX
    checkbox Please make arrangements for three personal written recommendations.  They should include information about:
    1. How long the person has known you.
    2. Explain how they came to know you.
    3. Give examples of the qualities they think will make you a good Big Sister.
    4. Explain how they came to realize those qualities.
    5. Any other information the person may feel is pertinent.
    Have those recommendations sent directly to our program (see our Contact page for email and mailing addresses).
  7. STEP SEVEN
    checkbox Turn in your application to the Big Sister League Mentor Program when you have completed it.  You can mail it, drop it off, or bring it with you at any time during the process.

  8. COMPLETING THE MATCH:
    checkbox When we receive your fingerprint clearance from Sacramento, the program director will call you to set up a personal interview, unless you have already met at the orientation.

    You will be given a choice of Little Sisters in your area. If those potential matches are unsatisfactory, you will have a choice of driving further, or waiting until a Little Sister is available in your area. Every effort will be made to make a happy match for everyone involved.

    Please stay in contact with the office. We will be happy to tell you where you are in the process. Leave telephone messages at (619) 297-1135 any time a question occurs to you. The answering machine is always on.

    Once a year, we may ask you to come back for a meeting to update any forms that may have changed, emergency contacts, etc., as well as keep you up to date on what the Big Sister League of San Diego is doing and how you can help us help girls in our San Diego community as well as the League.

    Make sure you leave a phone or e-mail message because I could be out interviewing a child, etc. and I wouldn’t want to miss your call. Your call may be returned by me or my assistant, Jen Moyle.

The most valuable gift a Big Sister gives to her Little Sister is her time, insight and caring affection for her Little Sister.

A big sister is someone who:

  • A Little Sister may grow to know well, to talk with freely in a way that allows her to discover who she is and what her feelings are about herself and other significant people in her life.
  • May help her Little Sister to gradually improve her self esteem and make creative, responsible use of her capacities and strengths
  • Uses her own experiences to involve herself in a relationship with her Little Sister. Each person does it differently.
  • Is a consistent, reliable, long-term companion who cares about her Little Sister and accepts her as she is with all her feelings, thoughts, attitudes and values.

A big sister is not:

  • Someone who showers their little sister with gifts. We do not encourage a Big Sister to take girls to expensive theme parks and events on a regular basis, or to give their girl lots of gifts. If a Big Sister elects to take her Little Sister to an amusement park or event, the Big Sister is responsible for paying the admission fee, food and drinks. Any extra spending (i.e., toys or mementoes from a gift shop) should be provided by the family of the Little Sister or the Little Sister's allowance.
  • A therapist, counselor, baby-sitter or parent. Matches are also not for the sole purpose of tutoring a girl, improving school grades or considered punitive or compulsory in any way. (A child's school counselor can assist with tutoring options).

Above all, a Big Sister & Little Sisters are to have fun together!
Thanks for caring, Jen Moyle